I have met quite a few wonderful people in the past week including several acclaimed musicians, the composer Mario Davidovsky and other profs who are involved in Asian studies. Meeting these people, talking to them and attending their lectures was like being at an oasis in the desert. All these great experiences are now difficult to relive, as I can now COMPARE ... what a scary word!
I feel like I have been starved and I'm getting stuck in a rut. I miss the intellectual & philosophical discussions I used to have with my professors. I miss piano lessons. I miss reading for the love of it. I miss having a brain. I am a human BEING. I hope I've not morphed into a human doing.. There is such a push in my dept to do and do and do. There is neither time for reflection, nor a wisdom of discerning the important from the urgent. Nothing has time to mature and go deeper beyond the surface.
I have three weeks to my comprehensive exam. I look forward to getting this hurdle out of the way. For the second time (only), I will skip a week of school in March and head to Toronto. I hope to regain some sense of focus and sanity with a two-week break. What matters in the long run for me is that I finish this DMA (doesn't mean anything) and resume my goals. For now, they will be on hold.
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